ThoughtFox

I have seen how fragile And therefore how futile I have seen moments like stars Dotted out against the sky Lost in time I have seen this. I have looked at the next moment And known it wasn't there. And just as clearly I have seen Friendship broken by a word Relationships spoilt in fatal revelation Felt the loss of being from one unlucky blow Personality diffused and memory distorted The misconception that is truth Expanded and exploded in the mind Of delicious wine induced reality Or velvet-wrapped warmth in that pseudo-safe place Between sleep and wild dreams. I have seen how fragility falls So I know how closely futility

She slid Alice-like onto the beach watching the buildings and people tower above her, shrinking her. Laying flat out she felt the pebbles making little round hollows in her back and pushing into her spine with exquisite pain pleasure, distracting, distracting. The great black hole in the pit of her stomach was drawing her in and she would collapse into it, emerging as something different. She had been here before, with someone else. A memory drifting across the circle of time, she could feel his body breathing life into her, shut her eyes and remember, freeze time for just a second. 'No push it away, its gone now, leave it, leave it' The b

I carry your words on my shoulder and you in my head almost all of the time. I would not choose to be this way. Late at night I pretend you are here, leading to some interesting fantasies which leave me weak and marked. And I imagine you curled close and safe our fingertips just touching, minds intertwined. These are wicked thoughts. Psychotic? Maybe... Pathetic? Indeed.

A kiss can only mean one of three things, friendship, passion or betrayal. So what was this my friend? DO you have any idea? What an evening, one of the best - just like at the beginning, something we seemed to have lost along the way. Just to sit and drink and talk       and drink and laugh and feel sad and drink and talk some more and feel happy again. One long continuous disjointed thread of conversation, discussion and argument, shutting out the outside world and the people around us. But that was your magic. You drew me in with your storytelling, painting pictures, making it real. You held my attention, enclosed my mind, left me h

This is a whisper away from the edge. That familiar breath on the back of my neck Saying 'come...' Watch the careful face shatter now, Dust pooling on the floor Ash after the fire 'Come back To the place where the power and pain And the heat and the cold Congeal' Tangled images spin backwards in time Wringing illusions of choice, Vision is blurred to a single sound And emotion cramped at the core. With my head on your shoulder You whisper despair in my hair.

She stands on a wire Balancing with care Her body bears scars of childbirth Her mind, wounds of marriage, Every line and fold upon her face The map of melted dreams That slid effortlessly through her fingers, Fastforwarding now. And she wants to cry out To the close and the same "Act now. For whilst others build normal lives You become deadened By the daily drip of the commonplace Pretending validity in Pursuit of a future that's already putrid, And the pill of convention. But you've no idea Of the speed you are travelling Or how short the distance." Her voice is hushed And her eyes remain silent, Watching them moulded

Electronic Communication In this nearly world Of reality and shadows I talk to friends... Foreign language Mystic symbols Stifled senses Closed communication. Some of you I've never seen Wouldn't recognise your sound Will never touch or kiss you Lunatic, lover or poet... Some, I knew your faces The turn and lilt of voice.. One or two, I've held your hand And cried real tears with you. Then there are those I can't remember How you look or sound.. The tap, tap, tap of fingers Forms images in mind But this lifeline of communication Is broken with a click.

Come for me Come for me and only me With no-one else to see. Sunlight through the branches. Softly touch and softly probe Give life for just a moment Take time suspended in confusion And keep it all so clear. With silence here and thoughts unravelled The right to be or not The warmth so teasing, finger soft Nibbling and stroking. So simple now, so really true. So lift the layers, come for me. Now only in the moment, let me keep This deep essential honesty.

Two There are two of us I've always known No pretence. She has always been, this other. She was alone, before. So I split us, Different names - Leaving her to find her freedom. I watched, I waited Intrigued and overawed. I've tried to hide her. I even killed her, Buried her and marked the grave. Odd then, she's back here now, Self-centred female Living in the moment Past haunting constantly. Forging forward Trashing boundaries She does not see or understand. Or maybe she does. She deals in signs and omens, Reads nuances and metaphors, Lives away from reality In a place that's very real. And yet not. Her emotions ar